Lonely

   There are always certain people that mean the world to you, that you can't imagine your life without.   There is always someone, when the world turns cold around you, that is there for you.   Always.   No matter what.
   I'm not a touchy-feely person, though I do love hugs.   Bunches.   I don't have huge crying fits over the fact that I spilled some milk.   I'm not one of those kinds of people.
   But sometimes, I am lonely.
   I don't know why I'm lonely.   I have friends, I have books, I have Jesus Christ.   I go to a public school class every day.   Most of the people there that I interact with are friendly.
   And yet still.
   The curse of being homeschooled is that you feel like you're either always alone or never alone, both of which are not fun places to be.
   I feel always alone when the entire house is quiet and I'm all done with school and my book is at a dry place.
   I feel never alone when I'm trying and trying to get my schoolwork done at 8pm and my brother is singing and my sister is crying and my mom is on the phone and my dad is watching TV.
   And I'm never at an impasse.
   I find comfort in my closest friends.   The simple fact that they're online may make me feel better.   We make exchange a few words.   Sherlock theories.   Book plots.   State choir music troubles.
   And I feel at ease.
   In the recent past, I've made some new e-friends.   They are so wonderfully fangirly fantazmacal.   They are like the sisters I've never had.   (Though I do have a sister.   But she's 18 months old and doesn't count.)
   With them, I can be myself.   And I love that.
   In the words of Finding Nemo: "I look at them, and I'm home."   (There a lot of perfect quotes in that movie, btw.)
   I really do not know how to end this post now.
   So...
   Humperdink.
   That is all.
Kitty has to go,
Grace Anna Rose